When I say "mother wound" what does it feel like in your chest?

If you know, you know.

This work is dedicated to my mom, Madeleine, who carried so many mother wounds of her own, that were never healed. Mom, the cycle has been broken. Rest well.

Things have been shifting over here.

Recently, I’ve become quite clear on my direction. A new path has revealed itself as I return to women’s work, as I offer myself as a guide on your own path, if you’re feeling a twinge of readiness. Just a twinge is all we need.

I’m excited to share the first branch of my newest offering, specifically for adult daughters on their healing path. It’s called First We Were Daughters. It focuses on our relationships to our mothers, and how those complex relationships have shaped us and the way we live.

I need to make something clear. My offering in no way is an attempt to blame our moms for failing us. Our focus will be alchemizing the injuries, healing the damage, cleaning up the debris so it stops here.

Our moms are/were human. Mothering “perfectly” just isn’t a real thing, never has been. And most of us, no matter what injuries were bestowed upon us, love our moms deeply, along with all the other complex emotions. Many of us, now as mothers ourselves, have learned firsthand the challenges of parenting, while living a life of our own, in a systemically structured, patriarchal society where women have been largely deemed “less than”.

We have made our own mistakes, so in no way is this a blaming, disparagement of mothers. They too have their own wounds, bestowed upon them by the ones meant to love, protect, nurture and guide them. Our moms have done their best with what they have. Yet for many of us, there is or was something missing. So living within us are wounds that have never healed. Still they fester, impacting fundamental aspects of the way we relate- to ourselves and others and to the lives we create.

I heard a teacher on attachment disorders say something like “Show me a woman with substance abuse, love addiction or food issues and I’ll show you a woman with mother hunger.”

Mother hunger, simply defined, is an inner injury stemming from unmet needs of an offspring, for nurturing, protection and guidance. While much of the available data and resources available focuses on injuries inflicted during the attachment period within the first three years, (attachment theory is rooted in this.) I believe such injuries occur at anytime, from infancy to adulthood, chronically, subtly and covertly. The impact causes damage that runs through a woman’s entire life, and even affecting generations to come.

Mother wounds get passed on. The inheritance no one wants. Until someone brave, someone like you, or me, does the healing work and learns, courageous step by courageous step, to mother herself.

If any of this relates to you, and your life, or you’re just curious, join me by subscribing for free.

Make no mistake, I’m not all healed up and tied in a pretty bow. I’m still doing the work. Things still come up, the opportunity to heal a little more deeply always shows up. And I’ve learned so much along this path that I am guided to share with you, fellow daughter. I’ll be sharing my story, and the tools in my toolbox for you to help yourself to. We can do it together. Your comments, stories, epiphanies and support mean the world to me.

I know this is a brave path, I’ve lived it, I’m living it now. If you decide to join me for the ride, then I know you, too, are a brave one.